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What is the proper way to go about asking a woman I have just recently started dating what she wants for her birthday? We have only been dating for a month or two, and it's a long distance relationship. Should I just ask her what she would like or should I go with something she is interested in. She really like hockey so I was thinking about getting her a hockey jersey of her favorite player, or maybe a jersey from our college's hockey team. It's not gift ideas, just what would be proper for a birthday gift in a new relationship
Answer
i think you already have the right idea
i think you already have the right idea
What is a good birthday gift idea for a Chinese lady boss?
trainee_ha
Hi, I have a new chinese lady boss who is a very nice person and I would like to get her a gift for her upcoming birthday. I havent had the time to really get to know her, so I am counting on finding some standard time tested gift ideas that I cant go wrong with. It would be preferable if the gifts have some sort of a chinese theme to it that she might appreciate.
Please help!
Answer
I'm Chinese!
As the Belarussian answerer said, you give gifts as you would any lady. However, do be aware of some Chinese gift codes:
- Most Chinese value the colours red and gold, because it is the colour of good luck
- Never give any forms of knives as a gift (e.g. letter openers, manicure sets etc) because it is perceived as a symbol of severing the friendship.
- Never give clocks, fake cash (like those rectangular notepads with dollars printed on the back of them) or white flowers--these are mourning items, and receiving them would be perceived as wishing they were dead.
Normally I don't give personal birthday gifts to a boss, but might initiate to arrange with some colleagues buying a joint gift for her. This makes the boundary clear that our relationship is business, not personal; and it avoids misinterpretation, especially in cross cultural situations.
My top picks for lady gifts are usually stuff she could wear, including earrings/bracelets, handbags, belts, perfume, or a silk shawl. However, these are very personal gifts that could be inappropriate for a boss; especially, if as your username says, you are but a trainee. Don't forget that Chinese people are very hierarchical, so receiving gifts as such may be awkward for a Chinese woman even if she is very nice.
If you really want this birthday to be your appreciation for her being part of your life, it may be best to get her a gift that she will use up and can share with her someone special. This may include vouchers to dine at her favourite restaurant, get pampered at a fabulous spa, stay at a hotel in a nearby weekend getaway spot, or enjoy an evening at the opera if she's into that thing. If you don't want to spend too much, vouchers for Starbucks or a movie would suffice. But whatever you get her, make sure you have two of them included, because (especially if you're a man) it's not as nice to receive one of these and not be able to take her someone special with. Not only is including two a sign of respect for the possibility that she may want to spend it with someone special other than you, but also two is a lucky number in Chinese numerology.
If you decide not to have a go at any of these, a birthday cake jointly bought with your colleagues to be eaten in the office/wherever you work never fails. Don't forget candles! Party hats & horns and decorations would be nice, but optional.
I'm Chinese!
As the Belarussian answerer said, you give gifts as you would any lady. However, do be aware of some Chinese gift codes:
- Most Chinese value the colours red and gold, because it is the colour of good luck
- Never give any forms of knives as a gift (e.g. letter openers, manicure sets etc) because it is perceived as a symbol of severing the friendship.
- Never give clocks, fake cash (like those rectangular notepads with dollars printed on the back of them) or white flowers--these are mourning items, and receiving them would be perceived as wishing they were dead.
Normally I don't give personal birthday gifts to a boss, but might initiate to arrange with some colleagues buying a joint gift for her. This makes the boundary clear that our relationship is business, not personal; and it avoids misinterpretation, especially in cross cultural situations.
My top picks for lady gifts are usually stuff she could wear, including earrings/bracelets, handbags, belts, perfume, or a silk shawl. However, these are very personal gifts that could be inappropriate for a boss; especially, if as your username says, you are but a trainee. Don't forget that Chinese people are very hierarchical, so receiving gifts as such may be awkward for a Chinese woman even if she is very nice.
If you really want this birthday to be your appreciation for her being part of your life, it may be best to get her a gift that she will use up and can share with her someone special. This may include vouchers to dine at her favourite restaurant, get pampered at a fabulous spa, stay at a hotel in a nearby weekend getaway spot, or enjoy an evening at the opera if she's into that thing. If you don't want to spend too much, vouchers for Starbucks or a movie would suffice. But whatever you get her, make sure you have two of them included, because (especially if you're a man) it's not as nice to receive one of these and not be able to take her someone special with. Not only is including two a sign of respect for the possibility that she may want to spend it with someone special other than you, but also two is a lucky number in Chinese numerology.
If you decide not to have a go at any of these, a birthday cake jointly bought with your colleagues to be eaten in the office/wherever you work never fails. Don't forget candles! Party hats & horns and decorations would be nice, but optional.
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Title Post: What is the proper way to ask what she wants for her birthday?
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